Spectrum
by foolondahill17
Summary: "Come back, come back, Meda! There's still time!" "I can't, Cissy. I love him." Boiling hot, icy cold, and warmth of the middle – the sisters Black until the end. "You are ice, Narcissa, you could never feel something as warm as love." Ch. 7, Dora had Cissy's clear, pale skin...
1. Chapter 1

Title: Spectrum

Summary: "Come back, come back, Meda! There's still time!" "I can't, Cissy. I love him." Boiling hot, icy cold, and warmth of the middle – the sisters Black until the end. "You are ice, Narcissa, you could never feel something as warm as love."

Rating: K+, for mild violence and character death

Disclaimer: I do not own it

Author's Note: although set in chronological order, this is not a chaptered novel. It will turn out to be a collection of one-shots of varying length with occasional large gaps in the time-line. I hope you enjoy it, and if you're interested in more concerning Andromeda I've written a one-shot story staring her and Sirius titled _Bondage_ which can be found with ease on my profile.

I greatly appreciate reviews, including but not limited to criticism of a constructive nature.

* * *

Andromeda Black walked behind her sister Bella in a way that would not be perceived as _following_. She watched Bella's black curls spring against her back with every stride she took down the corridor of the Hogwarts Express. The crowd seemed to part before her. Only a third year but she seemed to possess some kind of calculated poise that demanded respect of even the older students.

"Look people in the eye, Meda. Don't back down. Always be the first to strike and the last to let go. Remember, you're better than they are. _We're_ better than they are." Bella's heated voice seemed to reverberate in Andromeda's skull, drilled into her mind after months and months of preparation of what to expect at Hogwarts. "You're going to be on your own now, Meda. You need to make a name for yourself. Make a name for your _family_. Blood means everything, don't forget. There will be no dishonoring your heritage."

Andromeda's stomach was twisting. She looked up at the many students who passed her in the hallway and felt very small, very insignificant, not at all able to make a name for herself and not at all able to uphold the honor of the name Black.

"I'm going to miss you," Narcissa had mumbled into the sheets of Andromeda's bed, to ashamed to show her face and reveal she'd been crying.

"I'm going to miss _you_," Andromeda whispered back, feeling a lump rise in her throat and eyes sting. She couldn't imagine leaving her little sister behind. Lovely, trusting, sweet Cissy. They had been inseparable ever since Andromeda could remember. "I'm afraid, Cissy."

The words had slipped unbidden from her lips, and Andromeda was immediately ashamed. Blacks were never afraid. It was dishonorable to feel anything but cold certainty. To actually speak the words aloud was unthinkable. Bella would have slapped her.

Narcissa looked up from the blankets and Andromeda saw the swollen eyes and tear tracks running down her face. "You're afraid?" whispered Narcissa.

Andromeda couldn't speak. _"Don't ever hang your head, Andromeda Black. Don't sink to that level,"_ her mother's words had hissed through her mind. Andromeda made herself look her sister in the eye, made herself ignore the heat rushing to her cheeks. She nodded.

Narcissa brushed at her eyes with the back of her hand. "I am too."

"You should find a compartment," Bella's voice cut through the air like a knife. Andromeda looked at the back of her sister's head and Bella continued with not a glance behind her. "You need to start scoping out the students, finding out who you should be friends with and who you shouldn't. Don't worry, it'll be obvious."

Andromeda looked around her at the passing students and wondered how it could be so obvious because they all looked the same to her. She looked back to Bella and wished her sister would let her stay with her for a little longer.

"Where are you sitting?" she asked, trying to sound casual so that Bella would not suspect any weakness.

"With my _friends_, Meda," said Bella, still not turning a hair. "You need to find people your own age, make sure they know who you _are_. Try to find people you can be with at school. Find out what their blood is."

Andromeda didn't say anything. She continued to look from side to side, glancing at compartments and the students inside and wondering how she was supposed to tell. There was skin covering their blood after all. "Oh, you'll know," her mother had said when Andromeda had tentatively addressed the issue, "If I haven't raised my daughters to tell a wizard from muggle than I don't know what I've done."

"Well?" rang out Bella's voice. Andromeda turned back to look at her sister and abruptly came to a stop. Bella had finally turned to face her. She had stopped in the middle of the corridor with her hands on her hips and eyes flashing. "Stop following me. Go find people your own age."

"Where, Bella –"

"We're on a _train_, Meda," said Bella, rolling her eyes, "Going to Hogwarts. There are plenty of students about. Go on." Andromeda was dismissed with a wave of Bella's hands that looked like she was shaking her fingers clear of something slimy.

With many more questions pounding through her brain, but knowing she wasn't going to get any answers, Andromeda turned on her heel and started walking the way she'd come. She looked behind her once but Bella's dark curls had already disappeared among the crowd of students.

Now that her sister was no longer leading the way, Andromeda felt a bit lost. The students were not making way for her as they did Bella. Andromeda reminded herself that she was just an unknown, unimportant first year – something Bella had also drilled into her head over the Holiday.

_Make a name for yourself_.

With a moment of hesitation, Andromeda walked up to a gang of older girls blocking the corridor. Adopting the drawl she had heard Bella and her mother use many a time, she said, "_Excuse_ me."

_You're better than they are. Don't let them put you down_.

The girls looked down to Andromeda and did not get out of the way. The stared at her in a manner that suggested vague amusement and made Andromeda want to go run and hide in the nearest bathroom. Instead she said, "I want to get through."

One of the girls stepped aside with a roll of the eyes. Andromeda pushed through, remembering to hold her chin in the air as Bella did.

"Brat," muttered one of the girls and the rest tittered. Andromeda hated them. She didn't look back. She felt cold and shaky and tried to tell herself that the girls had at least gotten out of the way. She wondered how Bella managed it so seamlessly.

_Walk down the middle of the corridor. Don't let them push you to the side_.

Andromeda compromised by weaving her way through the students, ducking under arms and squeezing through gaps. Not exactly the center of attention but at least she wasn't skulking by the wall. She looked into compartments as she passed, catching glimpses of chatting students and reuniting friends.

None of them looked remotely her age, nor obviously Slytherin, as few had changed into their robes yet. Andromeda, of course, had changed into _hers_, as Bella instructed. Her new black robes were tight and starched and top of the line. The Black sisters didn't get anything but the best. Andromeda pulled at her collar and thought that some of the second hand robes had at least looked broken in.

_Fashion is not about comfort. It is about looking dignified. Dignity is everything. _

Andromeda slithered through a space between two large boys and looked into the next compartment. A young boy was its sole occupant. He was sitting on the edge of the bench, twiddling his thumbs and looking awkward. Something about him screamed 'first year' and Andromeda wondered if she looked as paltry.

She took a deep breath and drew herself up haughtily as Bella did. "First impressions are everything," she heard her sister's voice as though she was right behind her, hissing into her ear with her hot breath. She slid open the door and the boy looked up. He had a round, red face and looked jovial.

"Who are you?" asked Andromeda.

"Ted," said the boy, "Who are you?"

"_I'm_ Andromeda Black," said Andromeda. She waited for the start of recognition, the flush of crimson in his cheeks, but the boy showed no sign he had ever heard of the name.

"Hello," said Ted instead, smiling widely, "Would you like to sit here?"

_Show no doubt. Be prepared. Know what you are going to do before you do it. _

"Yes," said Andromeda. She stepped into the compartment, slid shut the door behind her and sat on the bench across from Ted. Ted continued to smile at her.

"Are you a first year too?" asked Ted.

_Black's conduct the conversation. You are in charge_.

"Yes," said Andromeda, "Do you have any sibling here? _I_ have an older sister. She's Bellatrix Black, third year, in Slytherin."

"Oh," said Ted, "No. I've got three siblings at home, thought. Two brothers and –"

"I have another sister, too," continued Andromeda, "She'll be starting in two years. Narcissa Black."

Ted nodded. Andromeda could sense the imminent decent into silence and pressed on.

_Manipulate the conversation, control it. Take them off guard_.

"Are your parents wizards?" asked Andromeda.

"I –" Ted started to say and stopped when the compartment door opened. A girl and a boy, both with blond curls peeked their heads in side by side.

"Hullo," said the boy, "Mind if we come in?"

"Sure," said Ted.

Andromeda looked at the boy and girl coldly.

_No one interrupts a Black_.

"We're Diana and Dirk Cresswell," said the girl, "Are you two first years, as well?"

"Yes," said Andromeda.

"Do you know each other?" asked Dirk.

"We just met," said Ted, "Andromeda just came in."

_Act as though you were there first. Blacks are always first_.

"I've been with my sister," said Andromeda.

"So your name is Andromeda?" asked Diana.

"Andromeda _Black_," said Andromeda.

Again it happened, neither brother nor sister showed any sign of having heard the name before. Andromeda was getting frustrated. _Everyone_ knew the Blacks. If you didn't know the Blacks you were unimportant – the Blacks didn't know _you_.

"I'm Ted Tonks," said Ted.

"Hello, Ted," said Dirk, "Is that a West Ham mark on your bag?"

"Yep," said Ted with a smile that split his face, "My Dad's supported them since forever. So have I."

"Did you see their game yesterday?" asked Dirk.

Ted replied that, yes, he had seen the game, and both boys went off on a spirited discussion about it. Andromeda addressed them both with a curious look but neither paid her any mind. She wondered which Quidditch Team they were discussing, as she had never heard of West Ham before, nor did their mark look familiar. She wondered what it meant to get a red card, or what on earth a 'slide tackle' was.

_Always appear to be on top of the situation. Blacks have no doubt. Blacks are never left out of the loop_.

It was completely unfair. Andromeda had never been a follower of Quidditch. She'd hurriedly wracked her brain for a way to turn the conversation back in her favor.

Diana turned to her and asked with a shy smile, "Do you follow football?"

The floor seemed to fall from under Andromeda's feet. _Football_? The Muggle sport with only one ball and two large nets her father held in such high disdain? They were talking about _football_? She had landed herself in a compartment full of mudbloods. _Oh, if Bella ever found out…. _

Andromeda hurriedly shook her head, no she did not follow _football_, and hopped to her feet.

"Andromeda, you aren't leaving are you?" asked Ted, looking up from his conversation with Dirk.

In her haste Andromeda forgot her poise, her calm calculation she was supposed to practice at all times, "I – I have to go to the bathroom," she muttered, and immediately turned to the door. She felt her stomach plummet and face go red.

_Blacks do not lie. We do not submit ourselves to such a low level of dishonor. _

"See you in a bit, Andromeda," said Ted. Andromeda did not answer. She flung open the door and stepped into the corridor.

She was supposed to turn back, to say with bighting sarcasm that she would _not_ see them in a _bit_. She was supposed to toss her head haughtily and make an exit they would not forget. Instead she slammed shut the door and practically flew down the hallway. The rest of the journey she flitted from empty compartment to empty compartment, dodged her older sister, and sulked in the girls' lavatory.

_Black's do not sulk. We do not whine. We take things as they are, hold our heads high, and manipulate the situation to our benefit. We do not admit defeat. _


	2. Chapter 2

Andromeda straightened her silver and green tie and got up from the breakfast table. Her heart had leapt in triumph and she'd smothered a small sigh of relief when the sorting hat had yelled "SLYTHERIN" to the students of the Great Hall.

"Hmmm, clever I see, determined to have your own way. You've a mind of your own," the Hat had whispered in her ear. "Bravery as well – loyalty, brains. And where to put you, I wonder?"

Andromeda had earned herself an approving smile from Bella when she'd taken her place at the Slytherin table. She had smiled in return and ignored the rest of the Sorting, trying to ease her fluttering nerves. She'd known it would be Slytherin all along, but she couldn't pretend she hadn't been minutely afraid – a little uncertain – had contemplated in her darkest nightmares what would happen if it was anything else. But none of that mattered anymore. She had earned herself a spot in the noble and most ancient house of Salazar as she had been born into the House of Black. She would where the colors with pride.

"Andromeda!" she turned her head in the direction of the shout, having made her way into the entrance hall, clutching in her hand the class schedule that indicated Potions first thing Monday. She looked for her sister, or for one of her dorm mates she had met the night before, but saw no one she recognized. Then her eyes fell on the hurrying, round-cheeked, blue-eyed figure of Ted Tonks – the mudblood.

Andromeda turned right back around and began to walk quickly away from him.

_Blacks do not run away. We hold our ground. We look our adversaries in the eye. There will be no retreat. _

"Andromeda!" he yelled across the hall again.

_Do not run. Stand your ground_.

Andromeda turned on her heel, Ted skidded to a stop in front of her. "What?" she snapped, squinting her eyes in a way Bella would address a spider running up her leg.

Ted faltered, "Nothing – I – I just wanted to say hi. Where'd you get to on the train?"

"I was sitting with my sister," said Andromeda coldly.

_Black's do not lie. We do not lie. You will not lie. _

"Oh," said Ted, "So, you're a Slytherin. I got Hufflepuff." He stuck his chest out proudly, where his black and yellow tie was untidily stuck into his robes.

Andromeda stared at him in disdain. He had no business talking to her. How dare he? _A Hufflepuff?_ She would have expected as much. He obviously didn't understand how the house system worked.

"Is your sister in Slytherin too?" he asked.

"Of course," said Andromeda coldly. Bella's voice, drilled into her mind over the years seemed to slip from her own lips, "Our whole family has been in Slytherin. Blacks are always in Slytherin and always will be."

"Oh," said Ted, "I didn't know it worked in families that way."

_Of course you didn't, you're an ignorant muggle born_, said Bella's voice in her mind but Andromeda held her tongue.

"Dirk said his mum was in Ravenclaw but he got into Gryffindor, how did that work?"

"I don't know," said Andromeda spitefully, and stopped.

_Blacks do not admit ignorance. We know everything. If not, always appear to know everything. Do not show your weakness_.

Ted shrugged. "Maybe it doesn't always work that way."

"Probably just for muggle borns," said Andromeda.

Ted shrugged again, "Maybe."

"Yes," said Andromeda with a drawl, "_maybe_," and turned to go.

"What's your problem?" said Ted aggressively and with a frown, moving to walk with her, "I was just being friendly."

Andromeda stopped, trying to shake him off. Ted didn't miss a beat and whirled around to face her.

"You don't have to act like I'm some kind of disease," said Ted, "Dirk, Diana, and I had fun on the train – you would have had too."

Andromeda snorted. Then she thought of her own train ride, hiding in the girls' toilet, and wondered if she _would_ have had fun with Ted and the others. She quickly shook away this thought.

_Blacks do not care about fun. We care about honor_.

"Well I don't know what's wrong with you," said Ted with a shake of his head, "You seemed alright yesterday."

Andromeda rolled her eyes but tried not to let Ted see. She started walking again.

"You don't know where Potions is, do you?" asked Ted from behind her.

She turned around again, "What?"

"Potions – the classroom – it says on my schedule I've got it this morning."

"_I've_ got Potions this morning," said Andromeda.

"Maybe we've got it together," said Ted.

"No – no, we couldn't possibly –" said Andromeda unthinkingly.

_Blacks do not say out loud what we think. We do not wear our emotions on our sleeves, for everyone to see. _

"Well," said Ted with a shrug, "I guess we do."

Andromeda stared unhappily at her own schedule, looking for some indicator there had been a misprint.

"Well, since we're going the same way we might as well get started. Class starts in five minutes. Wouldn't want to be late," said Ted.

She was not going to walk with_ him_.

"I have to go to the bathroom," she said.

_Do not lie, Andromeda. Black's do not lie_.

"Oh, okay. Do you know where Potions is, though?" continued Ted.

"No," she said, "Go find it by yourself."

"How are _you_ going to get there?" perhaps behind the sarcasm and annoyance Andromeda heard a curious tone of earnestness in Ted's voice. Perhaps of all ridiculousness he was actually concerned for her.

"I'll manage," she said with a flip of her hair.

"Well, let me come with you and then we can find it together," said Ted.

_I'll manage_, she almost growled again. Instead she rolled her eyes because she honestly didn't know how to get to Potions and she was angry at him for being so persistent. She started walking again and left it up to him whether or not to follow her.

He fell into step beside her.


	3. Chapter 3

"Blacks do not _flirt_, Narcissa!" hissed Bella's voice across the dormitory. Andromeda, along with several others, whirled around to see Bella, tall and imposing, facing Narcissa, small and pale, who was crushed into a corner. "We do not _flaunt_ our bodies at men! We do not _fawn_ over boys!" Narcissa's eyes were glistening with tears. She shot a glance past her sister to fourth year Lucius Malfoy who was watching the scene with an amused look on his face.

"_Look at me_," hissed Bella, grasping both of Narcissa's shoulders and holding her so she faced her. Andromeda's heart was thudding against her ribs. Her hands shook and she stared at Cissy's face, which was turning red from pent up emotion and embarrassment.

"Do not cry, Narcissa," said Bella. "Don't you ever act that way again. Don't you ever look at him that way. Don't you ever offer your body –"

"I – I didn't," whispered Narcissa.

Lucius Malfoy was muttering to his friends, they snickered and a wave of anger swept over Andromeda. Narcissa's eyes burned in their direction.

"_Do not interrupt me_!" said Bella and shook Narcissa's shoulders.

"L-let go. You're hurting me," stammered Narcissa.

"Blacks do not succumb to weakness. You will not cry, do you hear me?" Bella gave Narcissa's shoulders another shake and Narcissa gasped, but no tear slid from her eye.

"Leave her alone!" Andromeda was not entirely aware she had made the decision to stand. She stalked over to her sisters. Her mind was clouded with whirling thoughts, Narcissa's red face imprinted on her mind's eyes, "She's thirteen!"

"She is old enough," said Bella without turning to address her. "She needs to uphold the family honor."

Andromeda felt her stomach twist, watched in quick succession her meetings with Ted behind the greenhouse and in empty classrooms. She felt his lips on her own and she almost screamed.

"Blast the family honor!" yelled Andromeda. She was not immediately aware she'd spoken aloud. _"Do you mind that I'm a Muggle Born?" "No" "But your family would mind, if they knew?" "Yes." "Does that bother you?" "No." She'd lied._

"What did you just say?" the voice was low and threatening, something Andromeda had never heard slip from her sister's lips before. It sent a shiver running up her spine. Bella released Narcissa. She turned and faced Andromeda, drawing herself up to her full height. Her lips were curled into a snarl, her eyes flashing, hand reaching into the folds of her robes.

"I don't care about family honor," hissed Andromeda, her words spilling forth form her lips unbidden. "You leave her alone. She hasn't done anything wrong."

Bella looked for a moment if she didn't know whether or not to slap Andromeda, pull out her wand, or push her to the floor. Andromeda's heart was hammering in her chest, her hands shaking, but she did not flinch nor back away. She looked her sister in the eye.

There was a moment of complete silence. All of the common room went quiet. Except for Lucius Malfoy, who snickered under his breath.

"If I ever hear you say that again, Andromeda," said Bella in a carefully measured voice, reverberating of hatred and quiet incentive to kill, "I promise, regardless of blood, I will take out my wand and guarantee you do not return home alive." A shudder ran through Andromeda's body. She stared straight into Bella's eye and saw only hatred. "Never again. You are no sister of mine."

Narcissa crept from out of the corner and flew up the stairs to her dormitory. Bella held Andromeda's gaze for a moment longer, turned her back on her, and stalked out of the concealed doorway in the cold stone wall.

Stomach twisting, heart beating, Andromeda turned on her heel and followed Narcissa. She could feel every eye in the common room follow her, hear every thought and was terribly aware of the stinging in her own eyes.

She found Narcissa in the third year dormitory, sitting primly on her bed, back straight and hands folded in her lap as their mother had drilled into them proper posture. Her back was to Andromeda, her blond hair falling down her shoulders in a perfect curtain.

"You can cry if you'd like," said Andromeda stiffly from the doorway, feeling her own throat constricted.

"No," whispered Cissy, "Bella's right. I'm not supposed to show weakness."

Andromeda wanted to tell her to ignore Bella, that tears were not weak, that the family could go shrivel up in a grave, but her voice was caught somewhere behind the lump in her throat. Her words were lost among the thundering voices screaming in her brain. _"You are no sister of mine." _

"You shouldn't have said that," said Narcissa quietly, "Family is everything. Honor is everything."

It was Bella speaking, not lovely, sweet and beautiful Narcissa. Andromeda felt as though she had been plunged into a nightmare.

"It," Andromeda struggled with her words, struggled to manipulate them and make them say what she felt, "It isn't everything. There are other things – other things more important. There are – are friends and – and love – and –"

"And what, Meda?" interrupted Narcissa. She turned her head and Andromeda realized her eyes were not frosted with tears but with anger. Andromeda realized that that anger was directed at her. "Friends are not more important than family. What is blood but not loyalty? How can you say such things?"

Andromeda felt as though she'd been punched in the gut. Her little sister, her beautiful, sweet, darling little Cissy had been corrupted. Andromeda was too late.

"It's –" but Andromeda didn't know what to say, "I'm sorry, Cissy."

Narcissa once again turned her back on her. _You should be_ she might have said, but instead she didn't say anything. The silence threw into sharp relief all that had gone so wrong. It trod upon the might have been.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: a very short update. I'm not usually one to beg for reviews, but...if you enjoy could you please drop a line? If you didn't enjoy could you please drop a line? I'm very friendly to constructive criticism.

* * *

"GRYFFINDOR!" shouted the Hat. It had taken a minute, more than a minute. The boy beneath the brim had muttered under his breath, unaware of the strain of eyes around him. He had shut his eyes and soundlessly moved his lips and the Hall around him had waited –

_Gryffindor_, the crowd watched in silence. Sirius took off the sorting hat and put it on the stool. He stood in front of the Hall and glared at them all, _dared_ them –

People began muttering. People stood up from the benches to get a better look. People started whispering in their neighbor's ears. The Professors exchanged glances. Narcissa dropped her goblet where it clattered on the floor and rolled beneath the table.

_Gryffindor_, Andromeda hadn't realized – this proved it – she felt like something soared within her, that if she spread her arms she might fly. Something that might have been laughter or might have been tears leapt to her throat. She hadn't realized how brave – this proved it, how brave –

She stood, found Sirius's eyes, found his dark, daring eyes and caught them, and began to applaud. At the Hufflepuff table Ted stood and joined her. Sirius smiled at her, his arrogant, self-assured smile, and sauntered to the Gryffindor table. Professor McGonagall called the next name before the pause could grow much longer. Andromeda and Ted had been the only ones to clap.


	5. Chapter 5

Bella looked ugly on her wedding day, wasted and decrepit and corpselike. White had never suited her. She needed the rich, deathlike tones of red and black and tombstone gray to bring out her beauty. With her white dress and veil of white flowers entangled in her hair, she looked like something masquerading, a ghost incognito.

* * *

"Your sister's getting married?"

"Yes."

"What about us, Meda? What's going to happen to us?"

"No, Ted. Stop –"

"We're graduating Hogwarts in a week, Meda. What then?"

"_Nothing_ then, Ted. _Nothing_."

"You haven't told them yet? About us?"

"I – no. I'm _sorry_, Ted. Mother can't bear the sight of me as it is. Father – It's Bella, Ted. She suspects…."

"Are you ever going to tell them?"

"I – of course I am! S-someday. I promise. I love you, Ted. _Please_…."

"They're your family, Meda. I understand if you choose them."

"I don't! I _don't_ choose them. I love you. I want to be with you. I'll tell them, just – just not yet. Give me a little time. Just a little more time. I – until Bella's married. I – It won't be so bad then. Bella – until Bella's gone."

"Of course, Meda. I want you to be happy. I want to give you time."

"Please understand, Ted! I – once I tell them it'll be over! You don't – they'll disown me. They won't ever look at me again. I – I won't ever hear their voices again. I'll be lucky if Cissy's lawyer sends me an owl when Father dies –"

"I do – I do understand, Meda. Take what time you need. I understand. I love you."

* * *

Andromeda stroked Bella's hair with a brush. She longed to tell her sister something – _something_ – to not go through with it. Bella's marriage – Rodolphus would be her – _they're_ ruin. It was the end. Andromeda felt as if she was hurtling through the air, spinning to the cold stop when she hit ground.

Bella, dark, beautiful, nineteen-year-old Bella, sat haughtily unaware.

* * *

"Come back, come back, Meda! There's still time!" Narcissa hung to Andromeda's hands. She _implored_ her. Andromeda half expected her sister to drop to her knees.

Andromeda felt her breath leave her, felt the pain sear through her heart. Narcissa's eyes grappled at Andromeda's face. "I can't, Cissy, I love him." It was a death blow, but Narcissa still hung on. She grasped at life.

"You don't – you don't love him! What you feel for him his rebellion – lust for attention – it isn't love –"

Andromeda felt a wild surge of anger. She tore her hands from Narcissa's fingers.

"What do you know of love, Narcissa? Nothing!" the words leapt from her throat like the gates had been thrown open, mad with joy at their freedom. "You know nothing! Love is pain, and sacrifice, and madness_. Lust?_ Yes Lust! But it is raging madness not to be with him, not to keep him safe. The cold affection you feel for Lucius is not love. You are ice, Narcissa, you could never feel something as warm as love." Her words stopped.

Narcissa dropped her hands to her side. _I'm sorry. You should be_.

"You don't mean that –" said the voice from her sister's lips, "You're deluded. He's seduced you. He – he's corrupted you. He's filth, Andromeda, can't you see that?"

"Give up, Narcissa," answered Andromeda, surprised to hear the cool wrath rippling through her voice. "Let me go. There's nothing – no time – you've lost me. The family has lost me – They chose it, Narcissa. It's by their doing. I – I've left and there's nothing you can do about it –"

Narcissa should have screamed, a blistering, despairing scream _No_, but she just looked at Andromeda. The desperation dissipated in her eyes and was transformed into a cold wrath akin to acceptance. Her lip curled in a snarl that hid something of Bella in its depth. _So be it_, she seemed to say, and left.

Cissy, lovely, sweet, fifteen-year-old Cissy left.

* * *

Andromeda never got to see Narcissa wed. It had been five years since she'd been cast off from the family. Dora was three. Andromeda heard about it in a passing article in the _Prophet_. _Lucius Malfoy, to wed Narcissa Black on June 14__th_.

Andromeda would have liked to – to have seen her little sister – she was sure Cissy would have been lovely.


	6. Chapter 6

Andromeda heard it on Potterwatch. She hadn't seen him for months when it was finally confirmed. She knew it. She felt as if she'd always known it, known it with piercing resolve that it would come, had been inevitable. There had never been any hope. There had only been cruel despair when he hugged her good-bye and told her brokenly, desperately not to worry.

She had not bothered to worry. Because he was not coming back. She knew it. He wasn't going to come back. There wasn't any point to worry when it was already – the deed was – he was already….

No one knew where he was. No one had had any means to tell her because no one else had known. She heard it on Potterwatch that cold and windy night of April and she hadn't even wept. There wasn't any point to weep when it was already over, had been over the day she whispered _yes..._

_Yes, I love you. I do. _

She wondered if Bella would have laughed. Andromeda was almost sure she would. Cissy, perhaps, would have had the grace to let her eyes gleam for a moment in sorrow. Cissy, at least, masqueraded in love. But, then again, Cissy might have only looked cold and unconcerned.

Andromeda clung to a bit of lace and linin that was her bed sheets and stared at the wall across from her. The radio spouted static and blood on the shelf, spewing names that boded death and meaninglessness.

The war did not matter. This fight did not matter because freedom did not matter. Blood did not matter. This – this life, this pounding of blood within her veins and coursing of song and breath within her heart did not matter. This day, this night, this imprisonment, this world did not matter.

Andromeda waited. She felt sharp dread she did not experience when she heard his name bellow from the radio, when she realized that she would have to tell Dora, whom still held so much stock in hope.


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Note: here is a ridiculously short update. I had inspiration for another chapter, but ended up with an independent one-shot. You can check it out on my profile under the title _Sacrifice_

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Dora had Cissy's pale, clear skin and Bella's smooth, black curls. Dora was beautiful, so beautiful when she didn't change herself. Andromeda tried to tell her, tried to tell her daughter she didn't have to change for anyone. She was so beautiful the way she was born.

Dora didn't listen. She went through a pink phase, a purple phase, a phase where she dressed all in black and morphed piercings all over her beautiful face. She went back to pink, then to dreary brown, and back to pink again.

She lay on the frigid stone of Hogwarts and she was beautiful, so beautiful. She had Cissy's pale, clear skin and Bella's smooth, black curls.


End file.
